Florida is fantastic! Just got here and love it already. Now this is a
state that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy
evenings. What a place! Watched the sunset from a park lying on a blanket.
It was beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.
Really heating up. Got to 89 today. Not a problem, I live in an
air-conditioned home and drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to
see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a real sun worshiper.
Another scorcher today, but I love it here. Had the backyard landscaped with
tropical plants today. Lots of Palms and rocks. What a breeze to maintain.
No more mowing for me. NO MORE SHOVELING SNOW EITHER!
The temperature hasn't been below 90 all week, not even at night. Where are
those ocean breezes we heard about, still seems hot. Getting used to it will
take a while, I guess. I sure miss my LP collection, though. I'll have to
remember not to leave anything made out of plastic in my car. Got one of
those fuzzy steering wheel covers, cheaper than the burn ointment for my
hands. I always wondered what burnt flesh smelled like.
Fell asleep by the pool. (Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body.)
Missed two days of work, what a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson
though: got to respect the old sun in a climate like this.
I miss our cat, Tabby. He snuck into the car when I left this morning. By
the time I got out to the hot car for lunch, he'd swollen up to the size of
a shopping bag and just as I opened the door he exploded all over $2,000
worth of leather upholstery. I told the kids he ran away. The car now
smells like Kibbles and poop. No more pets in this heat!
Ocean breezes, oh yeah sure. Hot is hot!! The home air conditioner is on the
fritz and AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed
to order parts. Only hope for a break in the heat would be a hurricane.
Been sleeping outside by the pool for three nights now. Swatting the swamp
mosquitoes that are as big as B-52's. $1,500 in darn house payments and we
can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here?
100 degrees. Finally got the air conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and
gets the temperature down to about 90. The electric bill is almost as much
as the house payment. And two old lady drivers almost ran me off the road.
I hate this state.
If another wise jerk cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going to tear
his head off. Dang heat! By the time I get to work, the radiator is
boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like roasted
The weather report might as well be a damn recording: Hot and sunny. It's
been too hot for two months and the weatherman says it might really
warm up next week. And whoever came up with the Statement, "it may be hot,
but at least you don't have to shovel it" should die from heat exhaustion.
Doesn't it ever rain in this God-forsaken place??
Welcome to Hell!!! Temperature got to 102 today. Forgot to crack the
window and blew the windshield out of the Lincoln. The installer came to
fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?". My wife had to spend the
$1,500 house payment to bail me out of jail.
Worst day of the summer. I'm not leaving the house. The monsoon rains
finally came and all they did is to make it muggier than hell and drove the
damned roaches out of the ground. I wasn't aware they could fly!
The Lincoln is now floating somewhere in the Caribbean with its new $500
windshield. That does it, we're moving back to New York where all you have
to worry about is getting mugged.
I hope this state breaks in half and floats to Cuba.